All Guts, So Gory: A Horror Movie Podcast
All Guts, So Gory is a weekly horror movie podcast hosted by Mike, Justin, and Charlie. Each week, one host selects a horror film—anything from cult classics and slashers to supernatural chillers and modern gore-fests—for the trio to dissect. With a mix of sharp insights, dark humor, and plenty of passion for the genre, All Guts, So Gory delivers lively discussions that celebrate the bloody, the bizarre, and everything in between. If you love horror movies, this is the podcast to sink your teeth into.
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All Guts, So Gory: A Horror Movie Podcast
Build a Horror Crew Part 2: Weasels, Backstabbers, and D***heads
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The guys have chosen their horror film crew leaders. Now they take their roundtable discussion to the next crew member archetype, the weasels. And/or backstabbers and/or straight up dickheads.
Who are horrors greatest weasels in the protagonist crew? The ones who have ulterior motives. The ones who risk the live of others for their own benefits. The ones who we clap for when they finally meet their demise?
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All Guts, So Gory is a weekly horror movie podcast hosted by Mike, Charlie, and Justin. Each week, one host picks a horror film of their choice—anything from cult classics and slashers to supernatural chillers and modern gore-fests—for the trio to dissect. With a mix of sharp insights, dark humor, and plenty of passion for the genre, All Guts, So Gory delivers lively discussions that celebrate the bloody, the bizarre, and everything in between. If you love horror movies, this is the podcast to sink your teeth into.
Press play...if you dare.
The mad and mcum.
SPEAKER_00I'm just gonna bat you. Playtime's over.
SPEAKER_02Welcome to the All Guts So Gory podcast. I am Mike, joined as always by Justin and Charlie, and tonight we are into the second part of our series where we are building a crew for a horror movie. The first episode we did dealt with finding a leader, finding our hero, someone that's gonna lead this crew, who's on the front of your movie poster, and all that jazz. This episode is gonna be the opposite. This is weasels, backstabbers, and dickheads. Oh my. Oh my lions and tigers and bears, weasels, backstabbers, and dickheads. Oh my! And there's it it is a common archetype in horror movies that one person in the crew fucks shit up for everyone else, or tries to get one over on the leader, or thinks that they're untouchable because of their status in society and it ends up biting them in the ass, or they are the type of person that uh ends up having ulterior motives and stabs the people on their crew in the back, or turns out you know, in the end to not be a good person in the crew. So I think we need to come up with some ground rules. We did start with one of our main ground rules for heroes and leaders was that once you put somebody on your crew, you cannot pick another person from that franchise in your crew. So, with that, let's go around the table and just say who our leaders were that we picked. Charlie, who was your leader on your team? Mine was Alice from Resident Evil franchise. So, out of the other five parts of your crew, you cannot use anyone from the Resident Evil franchise, nor can you use I think the other rule was we cannot you can't put a leader in a movie in one of the other roles or a villain from a movie in one of the other roles. So, like, you know, Jason can't be your muscle when we get to the muscle episode, right? Right. Okay, who was your leader that you my leader?
SPEAKER_01Because well, I'm not gonna no excuses. I got the best leader, but it did eliminate a lot of other characters that uh could have helped me in my crew building. But my leader was Ellen Fripley from the Alien franchise.
SPEAKER_02Yep, yeah, and so now you cannot pick anyone else from that franchise, which some other people from that franchise are probably gonna get picked. I s me, I took Dutch from Predator as my leader, Arnold Schwarzenegger on my poster. But now when it comes time to when we get to the episode where we, you know, who's the muscle, who's the jock. I mean, fuck, who's gonna be bigger than Arnold Schwarzenegger on this crew? That's gonna be a hard one. So I kind of painted myself in a corner there, but we'll see if I can get out of it.
SPEAKER_00Your muscle's gonna be weak, kind of but you couldn't use him as muscle, but I couldn't use him as muscle either, but you could use blame Jesse the Body Venture. I can I can't, but you can now, but I can't. You can, but I can't.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, he is a sexual tyrannosaurus.
SPEAKER_00Oh, okay. So so we've we've clarified that. So now when we get to the final, final, final where the three of us decide what is the ultimate, we still can't use the case. It's just the cat's a predator at that point.
SPEAKER_01I mean, we still can't use the people from the same movie, right? Well, uh no, no, no. Uh, we're each gonna have a list, a complete list.
SPEAKER_02We'll each have our own crew of six right people, but we're not gonna combine all those into the ultimate. We will probably make one ultimate crew based off of our picks. So, does the same rules apply? It should. It should. No one from duplicate franchises. Okay, yeah. Like a dream team, if you will. Yeah, so we talked about heroes. This episode of the Weasel, Weasels, Backstabbers, and Dickheads. The other four roles in our crew are gonna be the heart, the heart and soul of the film. Moral compass, heart and soul. The moral the moral compass, yes, the brains, the smart person, the slipworm, the muscle, obviously the jock character, and then finally the comic relief, the funny guy in the crew, guy everyone loves, the guy that you hate to see, arguably the most.
SPEAKER_00I I sometimes I put comic relief above the hero. Yeah, that's why I was hoping that we I mean they comic relief takes the movie and amps it up sometimes for me.
SPEAKER_02Agree.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_02So now we have to go over the rules just for this episode because we talked about some of our ground rules for all of them. We need to nail down who is a weasel, who is a backstabber. I I would like to go out and start by saying, I don't think you can pick someone that turns out to be the villain. Correct. So I don't think you can't say that Billy and Stu from Scream are backstabbing dick-headed weasels because they eventually are revealed to be the ones trying to kill while they are while they are the ghost faces. They are ghost faces, literally, big faces. They are the villain. Yeah, literally. No, I agree 100%. I think this needs to be more like the who is like Ellis from Die Hard, those kind of guys. Yeah, right. Where they're not Alan Rickman in Die Hard, they're not the villain, but they are an antagonist.
SPEAKER_01This is the Wayne Knight character in uh Jurassic Park, right? Also, another thing I want to throw out there is I mean, I don't know, we've we haven't looked at each other's list, right? So I don't know where everybody's gonna land on this, but I don't think they can have a redemption arc. No. I think the the that I don't think they're a good weasel if they have a redemption arc, right?
SPEAKER_00Correct. They can't make up. They can't also be a hero at the end, yeah.
SPEAKER_02Right, right. Agreed. So we're all good on that part, right? Yep, yep. Okay. Other than keeping your pants on, that's the only rules I got. Anything else to talk about?
unknownNo.
SPEAKER_01No, I mean, do we want to like do some preambles on like what we went into, or do we want to use our each of our opportunities?
SPEAKER_00I'll I'll we'll start with real quick. If you guys haven't figured out, we are making this up as we go along. So but we're kind of we're right, we're ironing out the lumps. That's all we're doing. We're getting everything nice and smooth. So by the time we get to comic relief, oh yeah, we got that bing bang boom.
SPEAKER_02You're fine, bang, boom, you're fired.
SPEAKER_01Uh no, this is the house of learned doctors, so we are not winging anything.
SPEAKER_00You're not a doctor, you're a curly headed fuck.
SPEAKER_02All right, Charlie, let's start with you. What was your process for picking your weasels, backstabbers, and dickheads, and what makes a great dickhead? The process is super easy.
SPEAKER_00Like we kind of spelled it out. It's the guy that is part of the team taking on whatever the villain, the bad guy, the zombies, the xenomorphs, whatever it is, and he's supposed to be on your team. But turns out she is Honey Pie who gets in the beer truck and drives off and leaves everybody in the fucking bar to die. Feast shout out. Right? Feast. Right, exactly. That's that's so that was really my only uh thought process was there's they're on the team and they fuck the team over. Right. And there's no redemption arc, they don't make up for it in the end. She doesn't come back with the beer truck and like, oh, I was just fucking around, guys.
SPEAKER_01I've I've I've dug a little deeper in this and not deeper, but like differently. So yes, they are they their actions were led by like just pure self-preservation or material gain. I also said how close how unforgivable, if you will, was the act? Like how close were you? Were you was this a partner? Were you married to this person? You know, like how close, how unforgivable was this? How much damage did you cause because of your actions, right? How satisfying was the comeuppance of it? Because a good weasel gets a good death, right? Sure. And how punchable are they? Like, how much did you just want to punch them in the face? But I mean, those are all.
SPEAKER_00In my head, but you you know I broke it into categories. Broke it into categories so that a normal human, I'm kind of like Charlie on uh always sunny. Like if I wrote a play, you're not gonna read it. I have to read it to you.
SPEAKER_01Do a Charlie work.
SPEAKER_00Charlie work.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. A couple of the traits I picked for making a good dickhead or backstab or weasel, one of them is their level of entitlement. Does their status in society make them feel bulletproof, if you will? That makes a good one, yeah. Are they a manipulator? Do they manipulate people to get what they want or to try to, you know, save themselves by making someone else make a decision that would harm them but help themselves? Right. How much tension do they create among the group? Like there's some harmony among a good group, and then you know, a dickhead or a backstabber, a weasel may just like raise that tension, like you know, to an uncomfortable level where you're not, you know, you're not having that nice, I don't know what the word is, other than harmony, um, but that good energy, good vibes. You're not bad vibes, bad vibes only, I guess. Yeah, could you stand to be in the same room with this person? Like, is this person so shitty that you're just punchable that you're just like I can't be around this guy? And then come up and say ahead as my fifth one. Like, how satisfying was it when they eat it? Is what I had. So yeah, I have one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight. I have nine for my list. I think we're gonna go around and do a top five and then talk about some honorable mentions, and then our number ones, just like we did for leaders, will be the one that we pick to team up with our leader as the second member of our cruise. Yep. So anti-hero. Yeah, let's see here. And as we go around, if if somebody names one that someone else had, then after that person goes, that person jump in and jump in for three seconds.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, and then we're gonna we're gonna do some tough cuts first. We're gonna maybe mention one or two tough cuts that we didn't make the top five, or we're gonna do the five and the honorable mentions. Yeah, we'll do the honorable.
SPEAKER_02We'll do that first. You could yeah, sure. You can. What did we do for the heroes? Yeah, we did it kind of. I think we just did it where someone mentioned one. Yeah, we just did both. So okay. I'll put, I'll throw, let's do both. I'll throw two honorable mentions out there. All right. Okay. My my the lowest one on my list, I have the mayor from Jaws. Oh entitlement. I don't think he's very entitled. It's like a three. Does he manipulate? He doesn't really throw his weight around as the mayor. He kind of asks Brody, like we need to do this, and like, but he's not like ruling with an iron fist. Does he create tension? Yeah, nobody wants to get in the water, and he's like, go in the water, it's safe. Like, nobody's gonna just put something somebody's recently been eaten. Can you stand to be around this guy? Not really, it's like a four, it's four out of five. He's just you know, you even bring in the scientists and everything, and he's still just like not one to listen. And he unfortunately he doesn't suffer any come up its so he gets yeah, he's still the mayor. He's still the mayor in jaws, too. Yeah, he is never gets eaten once, yeah. So that really lowered his score for me, and that's why he is not higher on my list. Did anyone else have the mayor for Jaws?
SPEAKER_01I had not as a weasel, a dickhead coming in at number 10 on my list too. He's he's you had 10? Well, I mean, like, yeah. Okay, okay, okay I did, I did. I mean, so the stakes of what he did, collateral damage was high. Like he scored high on the collateral damage and the stakes of you know, wives doing he was doing it just to keep money cut flowing into the city. He stood on business, but yeah, as far as like how but like unforgivable. It wasn't like he wasn't trying to get people killed, right? He was it wasn't like his you know family or something he's trying to like betray or deliberately. So he was down, he made the list, but towards the bottom of it for me. Okay, he was punchable, he was average above average in punchability.
SPEAKER_00Oh, yeah, big mushy face like that.
SPEAKER_01Wouldn't even hurt.
SPEAKER_00No, absorb it. Charlie, did you have an honorable mention you want to talk about? Yeah, I gotta one. I don't know if you guys have seen this movie. The movie's called Howl. Oh, it's a werewolf movie, British werewolf movie, where this train, this commuter train is late at night and they go off through like a not very populated part of Great Britain. It breaks down, and there's werewolves. And there's one character on there named Adrian, and he's the classic, you know, snotty, snobby, uppercrust British white man who thinks he's above the rules and he kind of fucks people over and does everything to benefit himself.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, that's that's what Mike's talking about with that like entitlement where it's like if anybody's come to survive, I deserve to survive because I'm better because of you know exactly this, that, and the other. I will throw out a honorable mention, and that will be drum roll, please, Alex Ledemos from Ready or Not in his defense. He thought he was a good person. He thought he was a good person, but he did go like he he would rather marry or ask Grace to marry him than you know just like break it off knowing that they're never gonna be together. So his his actions cause this whole thing. This is his wife, his bride, so like it's the closest right of uh relationship you can have, and at the end of the day, he decided to save himself and the family. Weasel, right? So yeah, that was an honorable mention, but not he was number seven on my list total.
SPEAKER_02Okay, see is that borderline where it's he turns out to be the villain? But like I don't know for the most bought into being with the family at the end of the towards the end.
SPEAKER_01Well, so that's that's part of the reason he's more honorable mention in that, like in that you know, undefined. I don't think he was an active, like yes, he was unknowingly, like selfishly keeping her along, but he did not plan to kill her, right? He was like, if we pull that card, I'm not going through with it, right?
SPEAKER_02All right, I'll go one more honorable mention and then we'll get into our top five. The next one I had low on my list. I put Gail Weathers from Scream because so her entitlement is high, it's a five. Oh, yeah, she's like screen one, um yeah, specifically, specifically, yeah. But I mean, she's like, I'm this big shot new investigative journalist, I get to talk to, go do whatever I want, you know, off the record, fuck you, get a camera in your face. You know, she's entitled to shit. Manipulation, she tries to manipulate people to say shit on camera and tries to you know manipulate Sydney by you know antagonizing her about the the case with Cotton Weary and her mother's death and all this shit. Yeah, she's pretty manipulative. Does she create tension? Yeah, she gets on Sydney's bad side, she creates tension, but she doesn't like create enough tension to where it's as high a score because you week when she shows up at the party, they're not like on edge. They're like, Oh shit, it's a girl from whatever top story, whatever the fuck it was called, her news channel, her news uh show. That like everyone else except Sydney is just like enamored with her. Dewey is fucking in love with her. Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_01Because he was a what age was he? He was a 19-year-old boy, 23 or whatever.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, the demo. Like, could you stand to be around her? Yeah, probably. You know, I wonder why. Wouldn't want to work for her. My lie. And then again, like no comeuppids. He gets his, she gets her cameraman killed. She's around for six, seven movies, no comeuppids.
SPEAKER_01So I think she gets people killed. It's glad I ultimately eliminated her from my list because of she does have her redemption art. She has a redemption artist. That's what made her kind of fall off my list. Yeah, agree.
SPEAKER_00Do you have any Gale on yours? Or I did not have Gale, but I do have one from the 2004 Dawn of the Dead, the Tyber character.
SPEAKER_01He's great. He showed up on some lists that I was looking for.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, he's just like a total dirtbag. Uh thinks everything is for him and just kind of fucks it all up, has no redemption arc, gets his in the end.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. All right. I got uh let's do our top five. All right, all right, I'll do that. One last honorable mention for me. We'll get more honorable mentions in.
SPEAKER_00You get like 12 of them.
SPEAKER_02You'll get them all in at the end, or if someone mentions one that is an honorable mention, jump in with it. All right, fine. My number five is Carter Burke from Aliens, Paul Riser's character. And this might seem a little low on some lists. Disrespectfully low. He made he scored an 18 out of a possible 25 points for me on the Weasel backstabber and dickhead scale. His entitlement, I gave a three out of five. He's not very entitled. He comes in with a soft demeanor. He's like, I work for the corporate company, whatever, but hey, I'm a good guy. Like, and that's automatically kind of a red flag when you have to put that disclaimer out there. But manipulation is a five. He's always got this ulterior motive, he's a company man, but he doesn't create any tension until he traps Newt and Ripley in a room with a face hugger, right? But he's not like throughout the movie, like fucking shit up for the crew trying to beat these guys. Yeah, but he fucked up the whole colony. Yeah, he lies about their colony, yeah. Yeah, and then you know, for like, can is he punchable? Like, well, once he does that, he becomes that, but not throughout the whole movie. So he's like, Can you stand being around? I'm like, Yeah, he's he's a good guy.
SPEAKER_00He kind of always seems weasley, though.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, uh he's not as bad as some of the other people I have on my list as far as like I don't want to be in the same room with this motherfucker. And then his come up and says a five, it's a great. I mean, you know, aliens are gonna could have been could have been way better, you know. Face up he deserved the greatest thing.
SPEAKER_01Fucking 10. But it could have almost gave him uh a redemption, you know.
SPEAKER_02If he maybe so if if you had Burke as your number one, don't say it, but did anyone else have Burke on their top five?
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I have him in my top five. He is I sorry I closed it down real quick. Let me search it up. Justin, do your is he on your list anywhere?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, Burke would be a number five for me as well.
SPEAKER_00Really?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, so just because he can't be number one, he cannot be number one, but he's he has to be mentioned, right? Yeah, the intimacy of these are colleagues, right? So he gets a four on that for me. The stakes, he's doing it for for sheer money at the end of the day. He's like, I'm gonna sell this shit, I'm gonna make some money off this. So that's that's pretty selfish, right? Collateral damage, yeah, shit ton of people died because of what he did, right? Vulnerability. I forgot to mention how like who he did it to was you know, how vulnerable. There's a kid, right? Like he almost got a kid too. It's come up in pretty high score. He did die for his actions. Punchability was medium above average, seven for me.
SPEAKER_00You guys are categories. So, yeah, Burke was my number two. Oh, okay. Yeah. Oh yeah, he was high up. It's just so easy to hate him. It's just so easy. It is.
SPEAKER_01So what's next? Do we want to give Charlie his number five?
SPEAKER_00Yeah, Charlie take it. Okay, that's your number five pick. My number five is Simon Canton from he's the ship owner in Deep Rising. Okay. The one with Treat Williams. I don't remember. But he's the guy, glasses. I don't know what the actor's name is, but he owns the boat. And it turns out it was, you know, it was like a super spectacular. It sells in the the uh near Asia, so he's got like, you know, the Chinese, Japanese, Korean billionaires, and the ship is like supposed to be the most uh luxurious Titanic. What do you call it? No yacht? Cruise ship. Okay, cruise line, the the crown of this cruise line. The thing is, it costs way too much, they'll never make their money back. So he hires mercenaries to basically come over and sink the damn thing insurance fraud, nice for insurance fraud, right? So he but unknowingly uh they drive into like Monsterville and kills everyone on the boat all of a sudden, not insurance fraud, right? Kills everyone on the boat, screws everybody over the whole time, he fucks up the boat so they can't save themselves, and then he gets his in the end.
SPEAKER_01Okay, that sounds like a pretty shitty character.
SPEAKER_02Those sound like entitled characters, very manipulative. Yeah, all right, okay. Justin, your number five was Burke. Mine was Burke, so let's be able to do it. Do you want me to go to four? Do you want to go up to your number four?
SPEAKER_01I think you started, so let's get you to four. All right, yep.
SPEAKER_02My number four is I'll refill my drink real quick. My number four is a recent selection, it's Bear from its session.
SPEAKER_01Oh, Bear was the honor button.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. And I don't think this quite falls into like he is the obvious villain. Of the movie because you asked. Well, he is the villain, but he's not like Ghostface. He's not Freddie. He's not Jason. Right. Right.
SPEAKER_00He's a character made a mistake, got in over his head, and just made it worse the whole time. Right. He made everything worse.
SPEAKER_02He had good intentions for himself. So his manipulation, his selfishness is a five. His entitlement is high. Does he create tension with the people around him? Kinda like through his actions. I mean his homegirl face bashed in. Well, yeah. But but he's also like before he does that, he's just like this loser that goes to trivia night with his friends and just kind of like he drinks pina coladas and gets laughed at and can't talk to girls and just very uncomfortable, too. Uncomfortable his cat dies and he doesn't really exactly get rid of the body right away. Like kind of so I I don't know. I view it as a very weird guy.
SPEAKER_01For the same like he's not necessarily the villain, and he's definitely well, he is the villain in my book at the end of the day, but he is an unwitting villain, right? Like he's he's accomplished.
SPEAKER_00The villain is whatever this the demon or whatever entity creates the wish and yeah, the one the one wish willow, the store owner for not locking that shit.
SPEAKER_02He is not the villain here. Let's put that out there, right?
SPEAKER_01But I could argue that Ian fit the bill a little bit more with his like secrets and like sabotage and stuff.
SPEAKER_02Like that's where I was like and if you don't want me to pick bear, I'll pick someone else. You can pick bear.
SPEAKER_01Okay. You're not picking him as your number one, so you don't have to, you know. Do what you want. Yeah, it's justin.
SPEAKER_02I got I got bear, number four. All right. Man or bear. Justin number four. Or Charlie, number four.
SPEAKER_00I'm gonna go to my number four. Mine number four is from another great werewolf movie called Dog Soldiers. Oh. And the weasel is Ryan, Captain Ryan, who tricks who finds out about these werewolves, wants to go after him, and tricks the British military to send in this other unit as bait for the werewolf. Yeah, that's pretty rough. And then fucks them over, the soul survivor of his special ops team, and fucks over the other guys, like dragging them down, eventually turns into a werewolf and tries to fucking kill him.
SPEAKER_01But wouldn't that make him part of the big bad at the end?
SPEAKER_00No, I think that is he is not a villain. He doesn't like being a zombie, turning into a werewolf, like you're given the premises that like you don't have a choice. Tell it to a judge. He's a villain. But he's the weasel of the movie the whole time.
SPEAKER_02Right. Like Burke is not a xenomorph, just like in this one, Captain Ryan is not a werewolf. Okay.
SPEAKER_00Until the very, very, very, very, in which he was. So Ryan. Pretty effectively bad. Yeah. Good pick.
SPEAKER_01All right. Justin, number fourth place for me. It's a relatively recent one. It is the character, Nicholas Holt's character in the menu. Mark in the menu. He selfishly just wanted to go to that island. He dragged an I wish I had that, you know, an unwitting, you know, call girl with him, sex worker, whatever you want to call her. Escort. He was if he falls in the under the entitlement class. He falls into the come up, the come up ins is great, and the punchability is through the roof on this character. So Weasley know it all. The Weasley know it all. So oh my god. Yeah. So that and he knew.
SPEAKER_00He knew. Well he knew the whole time. He's the because the chef asked him, and what did I tell you was gonna happen when you came? Oh, I forgot about that part. We're gonna die. So you brought her knowing she was gonna die. So he is because they don't have a table for one. Right.
SPEAKER_01It has to be at least two people. We needed a second person. Yes. And it was an expendable person. That was a good pick. So that mark from the menu is my fourth place person. Okay.
SPEAKER_02Mark from the menu, number four. So we're around my number three pick now. Right? All right. My number three pick, it is going to be Trent from Friday the 13th, the remake, the 2009 Friday the 13th. I don't remember that. This guy is a the director's one, my book. A dickhead. Entitlement levels of five. He's a rich, wealthy college student, rich parents, doesn't have to work a day in his life. He's a dickhead about how rich he is. He takes his friends up to his parents' lake house, which is probably on Crystal Lake, if I guess. But like up there just to like impress them. The old horror movie trope of on the way on this trip. They stop at a CD gas station, and like you know, they're trying to make small talk, but like Trent comes in, just shuts that down. You know, he's just a dick to everyone he runs into. Later in the movie, he just he's just mean to everybody the whole time. And then these are supposed to be his friends, but he just brought him up there to like show off his house. And then his girlfriend goes off with the guy from the gas station who's looking for his lost daughter and is like handing out flyers. And then while his girlfriend goes off, she he sleeps with another girl in the group, has it videotaped. He's just a class A dickhead. So five for entitlement, doesn't really manipulate anybody, he's just an asshole. So he's like, you know, two always creating tension in the group. I mean, five out of five for creating tension, five out of five. You can't stand to be in the room with him, and then yeah, a pretty solid Jason kill at the end where he gets like yanked out of a pickup truck and dropped on some rebar, you know, gets skewered, yeah. So pretty pretty solid kill, but just a just a grade A asshole dickhead. Not even really a weasel. This is weasels, backstabbers, and dickheads. Yeah, he's a fucking dickhead. He's the dickhead. Heavy on the good dickhead. Nice.
SPEAKER_01Trent did not make my list. Did Trent make your list? No, he's a no.
SPEAKER_02All right.
SPEAKER_00Justin or Charlie, number three. Number three. Okay, so this one we discussed before. I asked about the Brennan Fraser Mummy movie. Like, it doesn't really show up as a horror movie in IMDB. I even Googled it, but I mean, I kind of always thought of it as like a comedy horror movie. I agree with you. Comedy horror action movie. So this guy is my number three, and it's Benny from The Mummy. Benny's a great weasel. He looks like a weasel. He sounds like a weasel. He's always a little sweaty and uh clammy looking. Yeah, trust him. He in the beginning in the opening scene, he like goes into this one thing and shuts the door on Brendan Fraser's characters who he can't get away from what's coming after him. One of the great parts of the movie was when they were on that ship on the Nile, and the they thank the bad guys. Turns out they're good guys who you know catch a thing, they all have to jump off. And Benny and Brendan Fraser's characters are on the opposite of the river, and Benny's like, I have I have all the horse. O'Connell, I have all the horses, and then he's like, Benny, you're on the wrong side of the river. So yeah, I mean, and and then he gets his come up and's in the end. Scared. Like uh horribly, you know, just it's a comedy horror action. But I mean, when you think about what happened to this guy at the end of the movie, I mean, he found all the gold. Found all the gold, found it all, had it all, and then it just lights go out, and then he's gone. Still there today. So yeah, he's my number three. It was a debate, you know. I was thinking strategy, so that's why I had Burke as number two, because I wanted another character from Alien Aliens way more than Burke as the weasel. So Benny is my number three, and then of course, we're to talk about Burke being my number two. All right.
SPEAKER_01We already talked about that. Justin, you're number three. My number three actually scored the highest on my categories, but like I said, we can do what we want. We can take we can take what comes out of our calculations and we can shift it because the movie doesn't live as well in my memory. It's a great movie. It's its 10th year anniversary. It is trained to Busan. There's a character named Jan Sook. He is a rich businessman who will do anything, including including throwing a pregnant lady in front of zombies to save himself. So he that entitlement we've talked about is super high. The state, I mean, it was to save his own life, but like how he did it counts, right? Collateral damage. I mean, there were a lot of people that died because they he didn't let him into a train cart.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_01We mentioned the vulnerability of the victims. Yeah, pregnant ladies, you don't mess with pregnant ladies, right? Come up in falls, trips his ankle trips, breaks his ankle or whatever, and gets attacked by zombies. Good stuff, you know, punchable the whole time, too. So Yoan Sook, train to Busan.
SPEAKER_02My number two.
SPEAKER_01Was it really?
SPEAKER_02Yes. Really? Yeah. You're not even a zombie guy. I'm I'm a I but I've said on this podcast I love train to Busan. I have trained a business in one of my other categories, one of my other characters. Oh, okay.
SPEAKER_01Okay, okay.
SPEAKER_02So yeah, I mean you you said it all there. I mean, this guy just and and add add to it, he's corporate chill, he's I'm entitled, I'm rich, I get and and like you know, and especially in Korea, like class, levels of class, entitlement, that shit is like like real. It's baked into the system, baked into the system. There is cooking show that I watched on Netflix, I think it's called Culinary Class Wars, and it's Korean, and basically it does explore like the levels of class between like you know, high-level chefs and like people working on the streets, and then trying to be like top-level chefs. But but yeah, the that stuff is kind of just like they they thrive on that stuff, kind of it's part of their character or their you know, their culture.
SPEAKER_00So, yeah, good choice. He's kind of like my Adrian from How another train movie entitled Dickhead.
SPEAKER_01Train movies with dickheads on them. Yeah, it's a common theme. Dicks on a train with Samuel L.
SPEAKER_02Jackson. So yeah, that was my number two. I got nothing else on that. So we're round to Charlie for your number two. My number two was Burke. Burke, that's right. Any any more you want to talk about Burke? I feel like we, you know, I know we got him pretty much pretty pretty covered. All right. Burke number two. Justin, number two to you.
SPEAKER_01Sorry, my cats are trying to bust in like it's feasting here. Uh my number two comes from everybody's favorite long movie from A24, Midsummer. So Christian is very weasley, right? His actions, he gaslights his girlfriend the whole time, causes him and a bunch of friends to die. He you know, cheats on her, more gaslighting, comeuppance is is great. The unforgivability of what he does is super high. His his girlfriend is very vulnerable, and he's super punchable the whole time. So Christian from Midsummer gets my number two. Oh, yeah, and then there's the backstabbing shit with his friends too, where they're all like choosing the same thesis to write and stuff, which was you know, less less betrayal than the than the gaslighting and stuff. But still killed. Yeah, he's uh yeah, he's uh he's a shithead. Yep, dickheads, weasels, shitheads, backstabbers, yeah, all this thing, yeah, all those things.
SPEAKER_02All right. Should we do number ones or should we do a couple more honorable mentions? Do what you if you got any honorable mentions you need to throw out there, do it.
SPEAKER_00All right, I don't have any left.
SPEAKER_02I'll throw out my other two honorable mentions, or I'll start with one and Justin. You can throw out one. My next honorable mention was this might be too low, maybe should have been on my list. I'm not sure. Major West from 28 Days Later. Oh, wow, yeah, yeah. The his entitlement is low, he's got a nice facade the whole time. He he's when you meet him, he's like, We have showers and clean sheets and very welcoming. I promise the boys, girls, and even like somebody when they make him like one of the guys on his crew makes like shitty food, and he just like is polite about spitting it out instead of like ragging on them or whatever. Just but his ulterior motive is to get women to come to their right mansion that he's fortified and make them their slaves so they can rebuild the population. So obviously the worst kind of guy there there is. Pretty bad, yeah. But he doesn't like create a whole lot of tension. He's he's got he's you could be in the same room with him and be fine if you're one of the boys. He's got a pet zero. He's come up and says, you know, get infected with a rage virus and turn into a freaking zombie.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, so that's you should never have a pet zombie.
SPEAKER_02I feel like I feel like his manipulation like is through the roof, and that makes him such a bad guy, but like the rest of them, he's not like that weasley otherwise. Okay, so you kind of but the other stuff, but it's so weasley. You want to be like you gotta talk about him.
SPEAKER_01Right, Justin, you got one? I do, I do. This is one of from a movie that I we did a podcast about. It was the one I gave you guys, what, like seven hours to watch? It was Demon Knight. Demon Knight. So it was Roach from Demon Knight. Roach was, you know, never like he was part of the group that was trying to survive, but he was the one quickly to sell everybody out, like to save his own skin, right? So he makes a deal with the demon, and his come up ins for it was, you know, he made a he basically made a deal that he got to survive, but you know what the deal is with making deals with demons? They lie, they lie, they lie, and then you get torn apart by other demons. So it was a fun come up ins. And what is his name? Thomas Tom, what is his name? Yeah. Not see Tom's owl. No, but anyway, he was he was oh Thomas Jane. Yeah, nope.
SPEAKER_00That's a guy from uh Deep Blue C. Yeah. The Shark Wrangler.
SPEAKER_01But anyway, Tom Saver Scott. Now that's someone else too. That's how I don't know. Anyway, move on. So he was super punchable, super hateable from the get-go. You know, his conflict, Mike brought up conflict with the the other group with that mailman or whatever. He was he was always being a disturber. So he fits all over the place. Just I don't think it was a big enough movie for me to count him as an all-time weak. Okay, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_02Great Dick Miller appearance. Yeah, I was like, whoa, whoa, great Dick.
SPEAKER_00Not Dick Warlock or Dick BB.
SPEAKER_01You got any others you want to you want to throw out there? I mean, Ryan Baker from Thanksgiving. It's kind of the shit. Like he his actions were kind of motivated by getting the competition, the romantic competition out of the way, framing that competition. Yeah, pretty low stakes on that one. Greg Stilson from the Gret the Dead Zone, the senator that literally uses a baby as a human shield at the end of the movie. So so that's pretty bad, yeah. So those are my honorable mentions. I also mentioned Benny as one of my honorable mentions, too. So good call with that one, too.
SPEAKER_02I think Thomas Hayden Church is what it is before. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's just like Thomas Jane. Exactly. My last honorable mention is Paul Allen from American Psycho. Entitlement to five. This is Jared Leto's character. I think everybody hates Jared Leto right now, anyway. So why not jump on board with that?
SPEAKER_01I mean, yeah, he was slimy and weasley, but like other than making people covet everything he had, what was his true sense? Just like bow. Okay, gotcha.
SPEAKER_02So it's his entitlement and is really really touchability. Yeah. He he doesn't really manipulate, but he's like he he doesn't even realize like who he's talking to. He thinks that Patrick Bateman is this other person altogether. He's talking shit about Patrick Bateman and his girlfriend to Patrick Bateman because he thinks he's this other person altogether. Like his shit don't stink, you know. Right. But his comeumpance is very, very hey Paul. You know, great, great, great, all-time great scene. Try getting a table with Dorsey now, you stupid fucking bastard. Love it. All right. So that was my another honorable mention was that one. Number ones. Number one. Number ones. All right. My number one. I've definitely talked about him on this podcast before. Do you guys want to take a guess? I'm afraid because I want to the greatest dickhead in horror movie history is in my opinion.
SPEAKER_00No.
SPEAKER_02Oh, that's a good one. Somebody from Pieces is the inspector? Yes. Or Pluto. Chainsaw with the sexiest chainsaw. No, my number one is Charles McCullough, the dickhead teacher from Friday the 13th, part eight. Oh. Jason Chase. You mentioned that. You did. I've mentioned this one. I think he foreshadowed that one a little bit for us. This guy, let's let's just start from the top. So he's just cold altogether. Like everyone he talks to, he just is cold. He shits on him. He shuts him down. His entitlement level is a five because he's just I'm better than you. I'm the teacher. You're the student. Like, you don't know shit. Like someone's late getting on the boat and he's just hounding them. They talk to him about like, we're worried about this Jason Voorhees, and he just totally like ignores it. Like, you don't know what you're talking about. There's no such thing as Jason Voorhees. That boy ain't around. He's been dead and has gone and don't worry, like whatever. Just totally dismisses all of that. They get on the boat to row the rest of the way to Manhattan when the boat they're on sinks, and all of the students are rowing, and he is sitting there with his arms crossed, like, can't you go any faster? Like, I mean, he's that's like the young subcan. Yeah, he's sitting there arms crossed while everyone else is doing the work. He's like, Can't you row any faster? And then they pull up to a dock when they get to New York and it's in a seedy part of town. He's like, Nice place you brought us to, to Julius, the the black kid on the boat that was doing all the rowing. And and then we cut to we we realize that one of the our final girl in there, Rainey, is his niece, and we cut to a flashback where he uh takes uh his niece out near the dock on Crystal Lake to teach her how to swim and teaches her to swim by throwing her in. And he's like John, you better swim or Jason's gonna get you. Like, holy fucking shit. So she's traumatized of the water to begin with. But she's an ad, she's a good swimmer, probably. She is now probably working, I guess. But so much trauma from all that, and he's just he doesn't believe in Jason, all this stuff, but he uses it in this flashback. Like, Jason will get you if you don't swim. Like, you'll go down there with Jason, and then the come the comeuppance comeuppance is is 10 out of 10. It's 10 out of 5. Jason picks him up and radiation dumps him head first in a bucket of 55 gallon barrel of toxic waste, just sitting around randomly in Manhattan. It's got one, you want to see it? Like, there is no other character that I think like you're watching this and like when is Jason gonna get this motherfucker? And then when he does, you're like okay, okay, fantastic. Now, my problem is I made him my number one, so now my movie cast has Anald and Peter Mark Richman as Charles McCullough, the dickhead teacher from Friday the 13th, part eight. Hey, I don't yeah, I'm watching. I don't know. I'm I'm gonna have to my rest of my cast, I'm gonna have to do some work. But that's what I mean. Well, like you gotta listen to your heart. Your heart told you to go with uh listen to your job. All right, Charlie, who are you pairing up with Alice from Resident Evil as a weasel to foil your plans?
SPEAKER_00I think this is probably for me the I mean Benny was like the physical embodiment of, but this guy makes Benny look like a good guy. Okay. David from Sean of the Dead. Oh, the Harry Potter looking motherfucker. As soon as I saw him, I wanted to beat his ass. I don't want to punch him, I just want to open hand slap him. Yeah, slap a bit. And then see him start crying. You know, he's trying to he's been trying to bang Sean's girlfriend, Liz, right, since they met in college. Yep. Hook up with her friend so he could always stay close to her, and just does nothing but run Sean down the entire movie and then goes to shoot Sean's mom. Yeah, yeah, and then another man's mom. Goes to shoot Sean. Fortunately, he was out of bullets. And the come up ends getting pulled out the window by zombies and literally torn apart right in front of everybody while he's like Fuck that guy.
SPEAKER_01He gets the best, like he gets the Romero. He doesn't have a car.
SPEAKER_00I don't understand why you have a car in London. Fuck you, man. Good one.
SPEAKER_02No, that's a good one. I wish I had that on the show. That was a very solid one.
SPEAKER_01Alright. My number one comes from another movie that I think it was an all hands on deck movie we did, a tempole movie. Comes from The Silence of the Lambs, and it is Dr. Chilton. Dr. Chilton is the most smug character probably ever. Probably wins in punchability hands down. He's always the one fucking with Lecter, right? Yes, right. He's the one messing with Lecter. He's the one that that gets jealous of Clarice's progress and calls the senator and gets gets him moved. Right. Resulting in cops dying, resulting in Hannibal escaping, resulting in just mayhem, right? Dr. Chilton, I think when I added punchability to my categories, this was what put him up there, right? He's he's a punchable guy. So ultimate in he walks around with this superiority, he's got that elitist, that entitlement. Yeah, and he's he's you know always hitting on Clarice. He's he's a sleazy dude. Oh, yeah. Yeah, he does. He's just a sleazy, sleazy dude. So Dr. Chilton is my number one.
SPEAKER_02Okay. Does he teach his young niece how to swim by tossing her in Crystal Lake and telling her Jason's down there?
SPEAKER_01No, no, no, no, he doesn't. Did he try to shoot somebody's mom? Doesn't he doesn't shoot anybody's mom? Is there club bumpets?
SPEAKER_02Like this.
SPEAKER_01Oh, there's off-screen. Yeah, that's what really having a friend for dinner. Having a friend for dinner. In all honesty, it it's one of the better lines. It's one of the better lines from the movie, but the come up ins brought him down to like where he would have been on third on mine, but I I hated him so much, I'm putting him on first.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. That's I think paired with Ripley, like I think you got a good solid. I know. I mean it's it's versatile. They're they're both like high, high-minded like intellectuals. Um, so they kind of fit well. Just wait till my brain comes.
SPEAKER_00What do you know, Alice? You're a zombie too. David. David's a good one.
SPEAKER_01Like, I think what what the goal was was this is like finding the most hated weasel, right? Is that kind of how I was that's how I went about it? Is like because the weasel, like the one that you clap for the most when they meet the maker. So the hero you want, you want to believe you believe in him the whole time, right? The the weasel, you want the worst thing to happen to them. The comic, you know, like yeah, that's how I'm attacking this, is being like, hey, what is the best version of this archetype, right? So that's how I did it.
SPEAKER_02One more time. Let's go around and say our number one's four best weasel, backstabber, and dickhead. Mine was Charles McCullough, Friday the 13th, part eight.
SPEAKER_00Mine was David from Sean of the Dead.
SPEAKER_01And I ended with Dr. Chilton from Silence of the Lambs.
SPEAKER_02Okay. Was there anything anyone else? Anything else we didn't hit on, or how do you feel about your picks after going? Charlie's always hitting on. Was there any was there anyone that you've heard that you were like, oh man, I wish I would have thought about it.
SPEAKER_01Actually, actually, I do want to talk about some of the ones that I had to rule out for redemption arc, right? So like Juno from The Descent was one that one was sleeping with the main character's husband the whole time, and two straight up killed another member of the party. Oh, well, almost killed one, but left her to die. So, but she kind of had a redemption arc. She fought side by side with the main character towards the end, and you know, they were both fighting for their life. So that I had to rule her out. Anyone else? Like Herbert West was another one that was like, I was like, he is but he is on the poster. He is on the poster, you're right. Like he is the main one, he was more of a protagonist. He fell on the protagonist, even though his actions caused everything, and then he was so tunnel visioned on his science. You know, I toyed with that, like for the love of science, is does that count as a weasel if you're like actively you know squashing people kind of thing?
SPEAKER_00But oh, I got one. So Deep Rising, I picked that the cruise owner, but the leader of the mercenaries was pretty fucked up too because he used them as bait a few times. It's never good. And when they were trying to get away, he shot the sidekick in the leg so he would go down and he could get away faster. And then at the end, when he was when Treat Williams gave him the gun and said, Don't say I never did anything for you, when he, you know, to kill himself with, he took a shot at him and and died with a weasley death.
SPEAKER_01I ruled out Dylan from Predator because Redemption Arc. Like a lot of these characters, like they had redemption arc, so it's like I wanted them on there, but then you know, I ruled them out. Did you guys rule anybody out for any reasons that weren't honorable mentions?
SPEAKER_02Or no, just I think like my first question before doing this was like, okay, like Billy and Stu, do they count? Should they count? And I think we decided no. So after that, I just didn't even think about half the other people that you could point to that are revealed in a whodunit as oh, they were the murderer the whole time, like ruled out all those people. But a lot more variety in this one. Oh, I think for leaders, we had a lot that we stepped on each other, or we had Charlie and I had the same list except for number one. Well, number one, yeah. And Justin had like three, two or three of the top five that we had.
SPEAKER_01They were just like shifted up, I think.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, and I think a lot more particip not participation, but a lot of more variety of of uh weasels and dickheads and horror movies. I guess I mean that's just kind of a testament to how prevalent they are in these kind of movies.
SPEAKER_01I I thought I was gonna run into some the first, like when you start casually typing in like famous weasels or backstabbers or dickheads, like the lists were kind of like underwhelming. But then Burke is always number one on every single one of those lists.
SPEAKER_02Burke's a great example, and the guy from Die Hard that you mentioned is the Yeah, I mean not a horror movie, but right, but like but that's the kind of guy that I was like going for. Smarmy, Waspy, just entitled, I'm bulletproof, I can fuck with the villain and I'm not gonna get hurt. Like, but then they do. Yep. All right, guys. Anything else before we get wrap this shit up? No, I'm gonna let's wrap this shit up, wrap this shiz up. Alrighty, guys. Well, what's the the next part of this we're going to do is gonna be moral compass slash heart? It is the moral compass, the heart of the movie, the moral compass, the person. Without being the protagonist, without being the protagonist, without being the leader of the group, but the person you don't want to see die. Maybe like a newt like character, maybe someone really wholesome somebody that's the heart of the crew. Yeah, that's true. The heart, the you know, yeah. The one you want to die the least, that's the way that's the same thing. The soul, like the one that the glue that kind of keeps it together, maybe. I don't know. Well work working, kind of difficult.
SPEAKER_01Working title, like Johnny Eagle in in demon hoys from the Johnny Eagle.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, the heart. Pretty much, pretty much. There you go. Okay, I cancel your cannery slattery. All right, all right. That's the next one in this series we're gonna do. And then yeah, let's get on out of here, guys. Thank you for listening to the All Guts So Gory podcast. If you like what we do here, please leave us a rate and review. We don't ask you for any money or buy us a cup of coffee or anything like that. Just rate and review, best thing you can do for us. A couple of clicks, a couple of keystrokes. We'd really appreciate that. Make sure you follow us so you don't miss your favorite horror movies as we break them down on a weekly basis here on the pod. You can drop us some fan mail. There's a link in all of our show notes where you can engage with us. We'll engage with you back. That's about it. For Charlie, for Justin, I'm Mike, Andy, take us home.
SPEAKER_01This is the end, friend.